How to Beat Self-Doubt and Become More Resilient at Work

Have you ever felt stupid at work?

Maybe you were asked a question you didn't know the answer to. Maybe you made a suggestion that was dismissed. Or maybe you missed a chance to say something insightful and spent the rest of the day kicking yourself for it.

Congratulations, you're human!

And you're not alone. Self-doubt affects us all, even the high achievers.

We can all feel dumb from time to time. It doesn't mean we are stupid, but it does mean that we're susceptible to self-doubt.

Left unchecked, self-doubt can lead to fear, insecurity, and decreased performance at work. Luckily, there are specific strategies to combat self-doubt that allow you to overcome challenges and develop resilience in all aspects of your life.

What is self-doubt at work? How to identify and beat it?

How To Identify Self-doubt?

Self-doubt is the first stage of impostor syndrome cycle, which will make you think:

• You should have known better
• You're not cut out for this job
• People don't take you seriously
• You're a fraud
• Mistakes like this will ruin your career

Don't listen. It's a liar.

Instead of beating yourself up for what didn't go well or how you could have done better, what if you asked yourself:

• How much will this actually matter in a month? In a year? In 5 years?
• What new information did I learn that I didn't know before?
• If my best friend was going through what I am, what would I say to them to support or reassure them?
• What new behaviour or attitude could I try out next time?

The ability to do this defines a trait called resilience. Resilience helps when unexpected challenges arise, and when we need to detangle ourselves from our own self-critical cocoons.

Turning Self-Doubt Into Resilience

When we call ourselves stupid, it doesn't motivate us to change. It does the opposite—it discourages us. It makes us live in fear of making mistakes, or even of taking any action at all.

We're much more motivated to change when we're compassionate. It gives us the confidence to rally up and try again.

The next time you're being hard on yourself, try this self-reflection technique inspired by therapeutic approaches like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), developed by Marsha Linehan: 

1. Notice when you're being hard on yourself. Awareness is key.
2. Ask yourself: “Is what I'm saying to myself true?”
3. If so, ask: “Is this actually a problem?”

Configuring two-factor authentication, forgetting to add tags, sending emails with formatting errors… none of these things make you stupid! You have made a mistake at work, so what? If something is actually a problem and not just a mistake, here are three useful questions to ask yourself:

1. “Is this problem fixable?” You might make an error that can't be reversed. That doesn't mean you are beyond redemption.
2. “What's the worst-case scenario?” Often, the worst-case scenarios are not so terrible. Ask yourself, what are the real-life consequences?
3. “Can I cope with it?” Okay, so believe the answer is yes.

A Reset Button For Your Brain

One powerful way to reset your brain is to simply track your progress. By keeping track of what you did and what it was like for you, you literally rewire your brain toward growth.

There will always be a next time. Instead of wallowing in defeat or using that doubt as evidence that you're inadequate, how about seeing it as an opportunity to learn a new tool or gain a new resource? Instead of giving up, experiment and create the conditions you need to adapt and do better. This is what develops resilience, confidence, and wisdom over time.

Practical Ways to Track Progress

1. Notice that, despite setbacks, you haven't given up.
2. Remember that it's okay to rest and that this doesn't mean you've given up.
3. Make and re-make the choice to focus on things you can do rather than things you can't.
4. Proudly remind yourself of ways you've already improved.
5. Record how your progress feels — not just what you've done, but also how it's gotten easier or how your confidence has grown.
6. Feel gratitude for the things working in your favor and the small wins along the way.

If you're already doing them, take this as a reminder or 'proof' that you're heading in a helpful direction.

5 Tips for Dealing with Self-doubt at Workplace

Particularly in leadership roles, self-doubt can impede decision-making, cloud judgment, and hinder career progression. Fortunately, as with many personal battles, combating self-doubt begins with awareness and a few actionable strategies.

Let's dive into five concrete strategies that empower both leaders and emerging leaders to tackle and overcome self-doubt.

1. Embrace Vulnerability and Authenticity

For leaders:

Leaders often feel the pressure to appear invincible. However, showcasing vulnerability can be a powerful tool. By admitting mistakes and sharing personal growth stories, leaders can create a culture of trust and transparency.

For example, a CEO sharing a story about a failed project during a company-wide meeting can choose to focus on the lessons learned and how it paved the way for future successes.

For professionals:

Instead of putting on a facade, be genuine in your interactions. Authenticity is magnetic and can foster deeper connections and builds better professional relationships.

For example, an employee who admits to a team that they forgot a task but is already implementing solutions can prevent future mishaps shows taking responsibility and integrity.

2. Reframe Negative Self-talk

For leaders:

Replace catastrophic thinking with balanced self-assessments. Example: Instead of thinking, “I made a wrong decision, and now the company's future is jeopardized,” a leader might think, “That decision didn't work out as planned, but we have the agility to change and improve.”

For professionals:

Talk to yourself as you would to a respected colleague or friend. Highlight strengths and areas of growth rather than just focusing on perceived shortcomings.

3. Celebrate Small Wins

For leaders:

Create a culture where every achievement, big or small, is celebrated and acknowledged. Example: Implement a weekly 1:1 meeting or team meeting segment where members share their wins, fostering a positive atmosphere.

For professionals:

Keep a 'success journal' where you jot down daily or weekly accomplishments. Revisiting these can boost morale during challenging times.

4. Continuously Seek Feedback

For leaders:

Regularly ask for feedback from peers, mentors, and team members. This demonstrates humility and a commitment to growth.

Example: A manager might conduct quarterly anonymous feedback sessions to gauge team sentiments and areas for improvement.

For professionals:

Seek feedback after major projects or presentations. Approach it with an open mind, focusing on constructive criticism to enhance future performance.

5. Invest in Professional Development and Self-care

For leaders:

Allocate time and resources for training sessions, leadership workshops, and self-care routines.

Example: A leader might schedule monthly executive coaching sessions or retreats to refine their skills.

For professionals:

Engage in courses, workshops, or seminars pertinent to your field. Simultaneously, prioritize physical health, mental well-being, and work-life balance.

Wrapping up

What if each time you made a mistake or felt stupid, you saw it as evidence that you're human and learning?

How would it reframe your thinking if you remembered that your thoughts and beliefs can change, that our minds and hearts are malleable?

How would it grow your confidence if you knew you were becoming more resilient over time and that your resilience gives you the strength to keep going instead of giving up?

Have no doubt that you can be kinder to yourself no matter what, and your kinder self is capable of great things.

Overcoming self-doubt is an ongoing journey. Embrace the journey, support one another, and watch as your professional world transforms.